Monday, May 30, 2011

FORGIVENESS LEADS ME HOME




Deep in sadness and regret, I take my place upon this battlefield, tarnished with the blood of so many fallen soldiers

Bothered still by the sight of the innocence on the faces of those that have fallen before me
I stand in dire regret of this terrible path so often we choose, so often we take,
I look upon those faces of the farmers, the fathers, the sons and daughters, that have fallen
All of us who will give our life for liberty, for freedom's sake

Etched deep within me is the dread of what this day may bring, the fears I must face
The anguish that wells deep within me, and the sorrows of this day before me
What must I do this day to preserve my life and the life of those that fall victim to the horrors of the hate we carry within us, the evil that man can do, also the fear I will instill in those I meet in battle today
And so I wonder
Who will fall prey within the sights of this weapon I carry
Who will be the first to fall before me, to die by the evil within my hand

That very thought brings me not even close to dreams, for the dreams
Go farther still with each passing day, and longer in their coming with the passing of those that follow
Nightmares in the making take their place, bring me closer to that one I would call enemy
To that farmer, the father, sons and daughters of my enemy, those I will face in battle today
Nightmares to make me stronger, help me forget the evil I must do
The fears I must face
The haunting sickness that drives me on into the night to face the nightmares of my dreams

The waking of a new day finds me still within this nightmare ever drawn to this place of death
Ever vigilant in my quest to defend my country, my honor, my life
Trained to do what must be done, forbidden to show compassion to those enemies buried deep
Within the hatred of my mind
No mercy, do not hesitate, bring quick to the shoulder my weapon of choice, the evil to do my bidding
Take the life of the one who stands in anger before me, notice not the fear upon his face

And for me
Face not the fear within me, show no mercy, show no tears, be quick and true in my aim
Be sure that no one makes it past my path
As I stand in wondering why, what brought us to this evil within us
What keeps us here, so deep in the sorrow of the pain we bring

Who will fall before me, Who will be my first
In that instant I see movement in the distance, I gaze upon the shadow of this enemy mine
And quick I am to react to his sighting, ready I am to take his life
And yet I stand in wonder of who he is
Is he farmer, is he father, son or daughter, is he also lover of freedom same as I

Barely the sound reaches me, as the pain bares grimace upon my face
Slowly I fall prey to the agony and pain of this terror of death
I rest to the ground but a moment as I feel the warmth of the life blood easing from my wound

Wounded deeply I feel, as I notice the shadow of the one who took this toll upon me
Closer he comes
Proud he must surely be, as I realize that soon I will see the victory upon his face, Soon I will see the hatred we share etched within his eyes and embedded deep within his heart, he comes ever nearer to me
And in my amazement and wonder why do I see a face of sorrow before me, why does he shake so

Why the tears falling down his cheeks, why the sadness at what his has done
Gently he takes me into his arms of comfort, cradles me yet closer to him
Regret deep within him at what he's done

Ashamed I am at what I forced him to
Bitter I am, that I fell prey to the hatred within me
To the hatred within us all
Sorrowful I am of its hold upon me
Saddened at the evil I have done

Just then
As darkness comes slowly to my eyes his words fall meaning upon my ear
Please forgive me what I have done, please forgive me, is all I hear
As his hand takes hold to my wound to slow the life force fading from me
Please forgive me for my fear
His words echo deep within my heart
As I wonder again, what brought us to this place of shame
Where now is the anger that came so easily, the hatred, and the fear
Replaced I feel by the shame deep within my soul

For what I did to this gentle man before me
Sadness at what I forced him to
Gladdened not by the toll I put upon his soul
Time moves slowly, faintly I fall within the darkness of light fading

At that very moment darkness takes me total to its power
The faintest Heavenly light touches me, and the pain is gone, the fear is remiss
The tears fade gently from my face As the burden of shame is lifted from me

And in a silent whisper
I form the words of forgiveness upon my lips
As this soldier brushes away the tears of shame from his face
Just then his smile of relief takes hold

As the Hand of Heaven reaches for me, it brushes gently the shoulder
Of the soldier at my side

Forgiveness comes to those who ask
As forgiveness will brush away the wounds upon the soul
And as my final breath whispers past my lips

Forgiveness leads me home

Sunday, May 29, 2011





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